{"id":448,"date":"2015-06-01T11:48:42","date_gmt":"2015-06-01T11:48:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/mixingout.com\/blog\/?p=448"},"modified":"2015-06-01T11:48:42","modified_gmt":"2015-06-01T11:48:42","slug":"your-summer-perfectly-summed-up-in-4-massive-fails","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.mixingout.com\/blog\/your-summer-perfectly-summed-up-in-4-massive-fails\/","title":{"rendered":"Your Summer Perfectly Summed Up in 4 Massive Fails"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"the-summer-of-george-meme\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Did you ever see that Seinfeld episode The Summer of George<\/i>? We didn\u2019t think so, seeing as you most probably watched Friends in the 90\u2019s. But for the handful of you who DID see it, you\u2019ll know exactly what we mean when we say every summer can be perfectly summed up by all things you never got around to.<\/span><\/p>\n

As for everybody else, here\u2019s your summer perfectly summed up in 4 massive fails.<\/p>\n

1. Do you even lift?<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

Every summer you tell yourself you\u2019re going to bulk up or cut down and get shredded. Well I\u2019m sorry, friend, but it\u2019s not going to happen. Three weeks into the summer and you won\u2019t have done any exercise since your last workout, which coincidently was your first workout, and also your last.<\/span><\/p>\n

By the time October rolls around you\u2019ll realise you haven\u2019t gained or lost anything, you\u2019re exactly where you were to begin with. And you\u2019ll make it your resolution for the new year to start the entire\u00a0<\/span>Mobius strip (go look it up) again, and again, and again.<\/p>\n

2. Book some time not to read<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

Forget about those classics you wanted to get acquainted with, you won\u2019t even get around to cracking the spine – more like cracking open another boxset on Netflix. Instead you\u2019ll order something from Amazon\u2019s Most Popular List at best. <\/span><\/p>\n

The characterisation will be terrible, the story will involve a murder\/relationship\/family secret told from several perspectives, tracking back and forth between two different time periods, and it will include a prologue written in the first-person. You\u2019re better off not bothering.<\/span><\/p>\n

3. Going nowhere<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

Thinking about visiting all those places you\u2019ve always wanted to go? Well, you\u2019ll look them up on the internet and settle for the view on Google Maps instead.<\/span><\/p>\n

The only thing you\u2019re going to see this summer is everybody else showing off where they\u2019ve been, on Facebook. Maybe they\u2019ve just got more free time than you\u2026 or maybe they have no job, unlimited funds, and more energy than you.<\/span><\/p>\n

4. The 101 that got away<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

A summer romance would definitely be the highlight of your year, whether you\u2019re currently in a\u00a0 <\/span>relationship or not. Unfortunately this isn\u2019t an episode of Dawson\u2019s Creek, or a One Direction song, this is real-life and you won\u2019t find time to meet the temporary love of your life between all those boxsets you\u2019ll be watching and all the places you won\u2019t be visiting.<\/span><\/p>\n

Sure, you\u2019ll see the potential trysts in every beautiful-looking, sweet-smelling, revealingly-dressed passer by on the sun-soaked streets, but you won\u2019t do anything about it. You may as well be looking at other people on television.<\/span><\/p>\n

\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Did you ever see that Seinfeld episode The Summer of George? We didn\u2019t think so, seeing as you most probably watched Friends in the 90\u2019s. But for the handful of you who DID see it, you\u2019ll know exactly what we mean when we say every summer can be perfectly summed up by all things you […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-448","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-food-for-thought"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mixingout.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/448","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mixingout.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mixingout.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mixingout.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mixingout.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=448"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.mixingout.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/448\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mixingout.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=448"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mixingout.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=448"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mixingout.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=448"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}